I lived! You don't know what I mean? This Christmas Day, I lived; I was alive! It doesn't matter if I didn't feel good because I participated, I talked, I laughed, I had fun.
Ever since the chronic illness set into my disability I have had next to no energy. Ever since chronic pain and the need for oxygen entered the picture, it's hard to even want to participate. With all this said, you can imagine that Christmas was not my best day of the year. Too many people and too much noise. Too long of a day at my Nana's with so many chances for my body to give out on me. Yesterday, though, I laughed and enjoyed my family. You know why? I knew when to take a pill, when to put my oxygen on, and when to relax through a medical episode. You know who told me? My dog!
Every time she knew before I did (which was EVERY time) she sat and stared, and then if I didn't take charge she stared at a family member. With Cleo keeping me in check, my mood stayed brighter and I stayed engaged!
As I write this, I am crying because this 53 pound, golden, Labrador Retriever kept me going for almost twelve hours, when I usually would've broken down. This dog, whom I've wanted for years and years, has helped me in ways I've never dreamed of. I love her, I love her unconditionally, because I was ALIVE for Christmas Day!
