A Letter To My Service Dog

Dear Cleo,

       Now that I have you, I can not imagine life without you. I searched far and wide for you, for a very long time. I knew I wanted a service dog, but in no way did I expect you.  My love. My girly girl. My dear, sweet, stubborn, "miniature” Labrador Retriever. This letter is for you, and how you changed my life. 

       Five years before you were born, I started my search for a service dog. I emailed, and applied to almost every service dog organization on the North American continent. You won’t believe what they told me! "You can’t be blind and use a wheelchair". Well, obviously you can, because I am! One of them told me "We can’t place a service dog with you because it might be falsely construed as a guide dog". I couldn't understand what was so wrong about training a dog to meet my needs. I mean, really?! You can definitely see how God put you in my life with what happens next. 

       I had found this organization that I hadn’t looked into yet, and I asked Nana to print out their application while she was at work that day. She didn’t come home with the right application. She came home with the application from Canine Partners for Life (CPL), where you were born. It is divine work because after not hearing from them, I threw the application in the trash. Nearly three months later I received an email saying if I applied they would train a dog to meet my needs. I applied within a week, and got put on the active waiting list! I waited for yo for two years!

       While I was at school one day, I received an email. The email said something along the lines of, "do you still need help with transfers? We have a dog for you, but she’s not big enough to help you with transfers." I didn’t reallly need help with transfers anyways, so that could wait, because I wanted you! On the way home from school I called the whole wide world to tell them I was matched with you! I could not contain my excitement! In order to take you home, though, I had to spend three grueling weeks in Pennsylvania to train with you. 

       Those three weeks were hard, and at first I had no clue how to handle you. It was three weeks of training me how to work with and train you, while also learning the laws. You know all this though. You were there. What was your first impression of me? Did you think that you were just getting passed around to someone else, or did you know that you were coming home? Did you love me, quiet voice and all? One of my fears is that I would be too quiet for you to hear my commands, but look where we are now. I guess you loved me from the beginning, too. I remember the first night that you came home with me. I undressed you and you ran all over the hotel room, sniffing every inch with your "big" nose. Then came bed time when you jumped on the bed, attacking me with kisses and I was the happiest Valerie in the world, smiling ear to ear and laughing. That night you found your spot right next to me on the bed, and I wonder why we bought a dog bed because we didn’t really need one! When it was time to go home to California, we just ended up donating the bed to the CPL kennel. 

       Then we had to brave the airport, and the plane. What I remember about the way home is the flight attendant telling me, "I can tell that she’s a real service dog, because she hasn’t moved the entire flight." We were a newbie team, but you were still the real deal! Here’s the part where you changed my life. There are some moments. Some instances. Some memories, that I would like to share. 

       Remember our first Christmas? I wanted that picture with Santa so bad! It was Eve of Christmas Eve when I finally got it. Santa… he seemed a little taken aback that he was taking a picture with a dog. I digress. Santa was not the point. 

       Along with Santa, the whole Crisci family came to Christmas. In prior Christmases with the entire family, I would get fatigued and my pain would get out of control. I would stop participating, and then get upset that everyone didn’t stop with me. Cleo, Christmas of 2016,  I did not stop! You told me when I was in pain.  You told me when I needed to slow down. I had fun! I bonded with my family! I had you! All of those past christmases, I needed you. That Christmas was one of the most fun Christmases I’ve had in a long time!

       The celebration of Christmas is celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ. You’ve learned that in church, haven’t you? I hope you have, or else you took communion for nothing. You embarrassed me because it wasn’t very “Service Dog” of you. I remember that Great Nana took my juice and cracker like always. She set the juice down in the cup holder and then you reached your little lizard tongue up to have a drink. On a separate occasion, as I was trying to put the cracker in my mouth it fell to the floor.  “Leave it” was never your strong suit, so you grabbed it off the floor as soon as you got the chance. But boy do I digress, you funny funny dog. 

       For a long while, the whole family went to church. But as time went on, Nana and Papa stopped going and stopped taking me. Then you came!I started waking up at the crack of dawn to catch the paratransit bus to church. For a while, I didn’t really realize that why I felt comfortable doing this was because of you. I knew that you were there to tell me if I was in pain, to pick up something I dropped, and to lead me to the place I needed to go. The MTS bus had always been an option, but it had never been a safe and comfortable option until you!

       You bring me so much joy! Along with you, though, came this whole new family. It started by making friends with the other teams in our class, then it… just, kind of, happened. There’s this group on Facebook of CPL graduates. Did you know that?! Now, I have my best friend, Nicole, and your long distance boyfriend, Cole in Pennsylvania. Remember when they came to visit us all the way here in California? That was a long flight for them!

       So, I have my "family" on the east coast, but it started getting boring for us here in California. You need to play. You need to train. I need fellow service dog parents. So, as I’m sure you already know, I started a Facebook group to find our local "family". I found them! Now, we go on monthly training meet ups, and have play dates. I hope you enjoy them! You always seem to have a smile after. Our meet ups have also been in some far out places and you help be there independently. 

       So, Cleo. My love.  My girly girl. My dear, sweet, stubborn, little Labrador Retriever. You have brought me so much joy! God definitely brought you into my life. You have brought me so much independence! You have brought me so many new friends that I wouldn’t have met otherwise. You are quite vocal, but I understand. If I was as smart as you I’d want to speak my mind, too. You learn new tasks like it’s nothing. I’m pretty sure you are as intelligent as a four-year-old human. With your smarts and help we will sail through any and all rough patches. When you learn how read, let his letter be the first literature you set your eyes on. 

I love you to heaven and back!

Your Mommy,

Valerie Crisci